How To Save A Life
by sleepy-emo
Summary: Life at Trost General Hospital has never been particularly easy – long hours, high stress and you can't get too attached to anyone who comes through the doors, just in case. But when Jean's ex-boyfriend/best friend is rushed to the A&E in a car accident it's Armin who is going to have to pick up the pieces for his mentor.
1. Step One You Say We Need To Talk

**Hey everyone, it's been a while since I've uploaded some Jearmin and there's something about a doctor's AU that's just a lot of fun and has room for so much angst. Anyway I hope you all enjoy the first chapter, I wrote this quite a while ago and though it was high time that I actually published it :D**

Breathe.

Inhale the fresh air, feel the light breeze and the warmth of the sun on your face and feel human again. Everything is warm and quiet. All Jean can hear is the gentle lapping of the ocean in the distance and the wind ruffling the grass. No sirens, no shouting, no nothing. Just the breeze against his ears and the far away waves. He takes another deep breath of that wonderful fresh air that makes him feel human again for the first time in what feels like forever.

Here he is: out on his own in the middle of nowhere with just the smell of the sea and the sweet undertone of some far off flower and he can't remember the last time he felt this relaxed and at peace with he world.

"There you are Jean-Bo!"

 _No._

 _No, no, no this is not happening!_

 _Not now._

"What are you doing hiding out in here?"

Jean desperately tries to hold on to the fantasy of being outside and alone but Ymir's voice is insistent on pulling him back to the harsh realities. He realises pretty swiftly that he's fighting a losing battle and, with a sigh, opens his eyes. He's back to looking at the off white walls of Trost General Hospital's break room and the cacophony of noise from just outside the door comes flooding back.

He can't help but resent Ymir for pulling him back from what could have been a much needed and well deserved power nap. She flops down into the empty seat opposite him and grins. He responds by glaring at her.

"Hey handsome."

"Go away," he grumbles.

"Ouch," she chuckles, completely unfazed by his irritation, "who pissed in your pancakes this morning?"

"Maybe if I hadn't been here since four o'clock and this is the first time I've sat down since then I would be a little more cheerful," he replies as he gets to his feet to go and wrestle with the coffee machine. He prays for something other than black sludge and, after a sharp rap to the side of it with his palm, his prayers are answered.

Ymir winces. "That bad huh?"

"So far I've had two suicide attempts, checked up on yesterday's near fatal stabbing, had to tell someone that, even though they're only twenty-six, they will have lost their sight before they hit thirty and had to listen to a woman insist that she's not going to stop using even though she's six months pregnant." It hadn't been a fun morning for Jean and having to re-live it even less so. He tries not to think too much about the patient he's just left as he moves on to the next one. He knows he'll go insane if he does.

"Fuck me!"

"Later darling I'm a bit tired at the moment," Jean says handing her the cup that is a little more sludge than coffee and sitting down again. "Drink your coffee."

She takes a sip and wrinkles her nose. "Zev Siegl would be rolling in his grave."

"Zev Siegl's not dead," Jean says.

"Isn't he?" she grins.

Jean shakes his head and rolls his eyes. "How are things in OBG treating you?"

"I never thought I'd get sick of the sight of vaginas," she replies.

"Shame you're a lesbian then."

"I'm not _that_ sick of them," Ymir chuckles.

"There's a new drug you could try to help you out," Jean says, taking a sip of his piss-poor excuse for coffee.

"Oh yeah?"

"Trydicksagain."

"Haha you're funny."

"Your girlfriend seemed to think so," Jean smirks almost hoping that will touch a nerve but alas to no avail.

"By the way I caught your work-wife crying in the supply closet again." Ymir isn't rising to the bait but dangling some of her own and Jean does have to reel his reaction in at that one.

"Who?" he asks, feigning ignorance although he knows exactly who it is that she's talking about.

"You know," Ymir says, not falling for it in the slightest. "Kid's not going to last very long if he keeps blubbing every time he loses a patient."

"He's a good doctor, leave him be," Jean says without thinking and instantly regrets it when he sees the look of abject triumph that crosses Ymir's face.

"So you admit that he's your work-wife?" she asks, smirking.

"That's not what I said and you know it," Jean says, rolling his eyes.

"Then tell me what is going on between you and the little blond daffodil?" she asks, that infuriating smirk still plastered on her face and Jean really would love to twat her one with something heavy but all there is to hand is a battered old copy of _Elle_.

"Have you ever considered bothering someone else for a change?" he snaps.

"Oh come on," Ymir chuckles. "I'm just kidding with you."

"Well don't."

"I'm just saying that the two of you spend an awful lot of time with each other," Ymir says with a suggestively raised eyebrow.

Jean glares at her over his coffee. "We spend a lot of time together because we're on the same rotation."

"If you fucking say so."

"What more do you want me to say?" Jean asks, not even bothering to hide the exasperation in his voice. "He's a good doctor, his only fault is that _maybe_ he gets a little too emotionally involved with his patients."

"I've seen the way he follows you around," Ymir says. "Like a cute little lost puppy."

"He was my intern for a year and a half and he's still only a junior doctor, of course he's going to have questions he needs to ask," Jean says. "It's not like we've seen everything."

"Ain't one stab wound just like all the rest of them?"

"Maybe you should prize your head out of the giant pile of vaginas and come back and do some real work," Jean mutters darkly, still glaring.

"To the ED? No thanks." Ymir snorts. "No offence but the vast majority of my patients walk out of here still breathing. I ain't going back to that bloodbath."

"Then get off Armin's case," Jean says with a finality that clearly says he's done talking about the subject.

"Look I'm just messing around with you," Ymir says after a pause. "I just thought you should know that if he's struggling he might not say anything."

Jean sighs. In her own roundabout way it's her showing that she cares but she's still a pain in the arse. "Thanks, I'll keep an eye out."

"Surely that's not your job," Ymir says, narrowing her eyes. "If he needs to talk to someone he should go see someone, not rely on you to pick up on the signs."

"He's fine, I'm sure he is," Jean says. "Besides so what if I want to look out for him?"

"Oooh!" she crows childishly. "So you want to get our little daffodil alone and up against a wall?"

"How d'you come to that conclusion?" Jean asks trying to sound as bored as possible in the hope that she'll drop it.

"Cause in the whole time I've known you you've never gotten close to anyone," she smirks like a cat that got the cream. "I was beginning to think you were a monk or a eunuch."

"OBG must be really boring if you've got all this time to think about me."

"It stops me from getting too excited when I've got a particularly hot girl with her legs open in front of me."

Jean rolls his eyes again wondering if they're going to get stuck like that. "I'm glad that I can be of service."

"So you've never thought about it?" Ymir asks after a pause.

"Thought about what?"

"Getting the kid alone," Ymir replies. "Getting him on his knees and having him suck your–"

"Armin," Jean says pointedly as the topic of conversation walks into the room. He's quite thankful that Ymir didn't get to finish that sentence as that was going places he shouldn't be entertaining while wearing scrubs. "You okay?"

An adorable blush spreads across Armin's cheeks ( _so he definitely heard_ that _bit, hopefully he didn't realise Ymir was talking about him_ ). "Um yeah I was just wondering if I could get some help with a patient," Armin replies, the blushing intensifying.

"Sure I can give you a hand," Jean says, getting to his feet. He throws his empty coffee cup into the bin and goes to join Armin in the doorway.

"Aww look at this cute little man date," Ymir sings with an obnoxious smirk.

"Don't you have some vaginas to stare at, you useless lesbian?" Jean asks.

Ymir throws her head back and cackles. "Alright fine if that's your way of telling me to do some work."

"Whatever," Jean says shaking his head. "Let's go Armin."

"Have fun!" Ymir sings as they leave the break room.

They walk in silence for a few minutes before Armin finally speaks up. "I'm sorry."

"What for?" Jean asks.

"I was interrupting back there."

"Don't worry about it," Jean says. "I'm thankful for the interruption, now what do you need?"

"Two things: could you take a look at a chest x-ray for me?" Armin asks. "I'm pretty sure that it's just scar tissue but I wanted a second opinion just to make sure it isn't anything more serious."

"Sure thing," Jean smiles, "and the other thing?"

Armin flushes. "I've got this patient, he's a heavy smoker, and I told him that he needs to quit or he's going to die but he said that he's not going to take advice from 'a virgin who's never even kissed a girl'."

"Wow rude!"

"Could you possibly talk to him?" Armin asks timidly.

Jean sighs and chuckles. "Armin you need to be able to get people to listen to you on your own."

"Yeah but how do I do that?" Armin asks. "It's not as if I can try and look imposing or anything. Have you seen me?"

"Well, you look him in the eye and say very firmly 'I am your doctor, deal with it!" Jean tells him.

"That's all?"

"Say it," Jean orders.

Armin takes a breath and glares up at him. "I am your doctor, deal with it!"

Jean claps him on the shoulder. "Atta boy. Shall we go and have a look at this chest x-ray then?"

"Please." They continue on in silence for a moment before Armin speaks up again. "I'm sorry."

"What for?" Jean asks.

"I shouldn't be coming to you with stuff like this, I should have confidence in my own abilities," Armin replies.

"It's fine, Jean says. "When it's someone else's life on the line you want to be totally sure. Besides you were doing me a huge favour anyway."

"Was I?"

"Oh yeah, I wanted to leave that conversation," Jean says.

Armin chuckles softly. "It sounded... interesting."

"She was being weird and inappropriate," Jean sighs. "So like every conversation I have with her."

"Oh..." Armin says. He fiddles with the end of his stethoscope shyly. "Then I'm glad I could help."

"Just out of interest," Jean begins after a pause, "how much of that did you hear?"

Armin flushes an adorable shade of pink and looks away. "Just the end bit. The er... bit about the sucking."

"Okay," Jean says. He's more than a little relieved that Armin doesn't know that they were talking about him. Although Jean should have guessed that he didn't otherwise his face would be scarlet right about now.

Ymir was wrong anyway. He hadn't thought about dragging Armin into a private space to get him on his knees so he could have his way with him (well maybe once but he swiftly put a stop to that train before it left the station). What he thought about more than anything was taking Armin somewhere they wouldn't be disturbed and kissing those pretty lips of his till Armin was begging for more.

He knows he shouldn't even be thinking _that_ about one of the junior doctors – one he would even consider a friend as well – but there's just something about Armin. He's beautiful and delicate and he looks so cute when he has his fringe pushed back when he's been on a really long shift. More often than not he thinks about asking Armin if he wants to get coffee, do something away from the hell hole they work in. They've been close for a while now but he'd like to get closer.

Maybe now that no one's paying attention and Armin's already heard Ymir being disgusting it's the perfect time. "Hey Armin?"

"Yeah?"

"I was wondering would you–"

He doesn't get to finish his sentence before the doors to the ED burst open and two trolleys are wheeled in, Levi striding in with them. He casts a glance over to where Jean and Armin are standing.

"Kirschtein, Arlert, scrub up I need you," he calls. "I've got two RTCs and I'd like to keep at least one of them alive."

"Yes sir," Armin says. He turns to Jean and smiles. "Ask me later, okay?"

"Sure," Jean says as he follows him over to resus.


	2. Between The Lines Of Fear And Blame

**Hey everyone, next chapter for you. It's about to get sad :( hope you enjoy**

Jean and Armin burst through the doors of Resus barely a few minutes after Levi calls them over and everything is pulsing with tense activity. One of the people who was presumably bought in from the accident is surrounded by doctors while the other is about to be moved on to the adjacent bed.

"On my count," Levi tells the paramedics holding the stretcher the second person is strapped to. "One, two, three."

Levi and the paramedics heave the stretcher onto the bed and Jean takes a deep breath as he pulls on a pair of gloves. Out of everywhere in this whole fucking hospital Resus is, by far, the worst place to end up. Trost's high crime and drug rate makes it very rare for someone to make it out of there unscathed. Each and every doctor working there tries their damn hardest but, as Levi always says when the death tally rises, _you can't win them all_.

"What have we got?" Jean asks, preparing himself for a fight to keep whoever this person is alive.

"Twenty-eight year old male," Levi says undoing some of the straps attaching the man to the stretcher. "Brought in from an RTC with his wife. He was the one driving."

"Where's she?" Armin asks.

"Over there," Levi replies nodding to the other bed. "Hanji and co. will deal with her, we need to sort him out."

"What's he got?" Jean asks.

"Concussion, possible neck break, collapsed lung and god only knows what other internal injuries," Levi replies.

"Right," Jean pulls a small torch out of his scrubs pocket to check how responsive the man's pupils are but as soon as he looks down at the man's face properly for the first time his heart all but stops.

 _Marco..._

He should have looked at just who it was beforehand but seeing Marco lying there, face covered in blood, makes Jean's stomach drop.

He hasn't seen Marco is weeks. He's been putting it off, making excuses about working because he didn't want to have to deal with questions about his love life and whether he's taking care of himself among everything else. He never even imagined that he would see Marco lying on a stretcher in the grips of death. All he can do is stare down at him, breath still in his throat and unsure of what he's supposed to do.

"Kirschtein!" Levi barks, snapping Jean back to the real world. "Wake up and fucking do something."

"Yeah..." Jean says, still a little dazed, "sorry."

"The fuck is wrong with you?"

Jean has no idea how to answer that. How do you even explain that you can't process the fact that your ex-boyfriend and best friend is lying, dying, on a table in front of you and you don't even know where to begin to start fixing him or if your hands will stop shaking long enough to be able to. If he doesn't pull it together then Marco is going to die but he just can't seem to shake off the shock.

"I... I don't know if I can assist on this one," Jean stammers, still unable to look away from Marco's blood covered face.

"Why the fuck not?"

Jean opens his mouth to answer but a high pitched whine cuts him off.

"Dr Ackerman he's crashing," Armin says.

"Shit!" Levi mutters before glaring up at Jean. "So why can't you assist? I need all hands on deck here or we lose him."

"I... I know him," Jean replies. The heart monitor is drilling into his brain and making his blood run cold.

"Not good enough," Levi says.

"What?"

"We are understaffed today and I need you on this guy or he dies," Levi says. "If you help out them we can at least give him a fighting chance. You know him so you want to keep him alive right?"

"Of course I do," Jean cries. That much should be obvious.

"Then get to it."

"But..."

"Kirschtein I'm sorry but we're short-staffed," Levi says firmly but with a hint of sympathy. "We need you, I can't take no for an answer."

"Okay," Jean says trying to harden his resolve to be able to separate the Marco he knows and has a history with and the Marco on the table in front of him.

"I'm sorry," Levi says. "Try not to freeze up okay?"

"Okay," Jean says. He grits his teeth and links his fingers together, placing his hands in the centre of Marco's chest. "Starting CPR." He focuses his attention on Marco, blocking out everything else so that he can think properly. "Come on," he whispers more to Marco than to anyone else.

The heart monitor continues to whine and Jean only takes a step away from Marco when Levi places defibrillator patches on Marco's chest. "Shocking two hundred. Clear!"

Marco's body jolts with the shock and Jean's heart clenches. _This can't be happening... not to Marco. Marco's pure, he's nice and he's too good for an ending like this. Please, give me some kind of miracle._ He prays to every god he can think of and it still doesn't feel like enough as he begins compressions again.

Jean's arms begin to tire but he pushes through it, his sole focus bringing Marco back so that they can laugh and joke again like they used to. The screech of the heart monitor, refusing to change is almost taunting him and there is nothing more that he can do except continue. He can't stop. If he stops then it's over but it doesn't seem to be helping either way.

 _Please... bring him back._

After four, five, six shocks and no change Levi steps back. "Okay I think we can all agree we're fighting a losing battle here. Let's call it."

"No," Jean says, his voice shaking with unshed tears as he continues to practically pound Marco's chest. He can't just give up like this. Not now...

"Kirschtein give it up," Levi says. "He's gone."

"No..." Jean says again.

A gentle hand find his shoulder and Jean finally falters. "Jean," Armin's soft voice cuts through the buzzing in Jean's ears. "Please... we need to call it."

"No..."

"We have to," Armin says. "I'm sorry, it's over."

Jean's breath sighs out a shaky exhale. "Okay..."

Levi looks at the clock on the wall. "Time of death: eleven, seventeen."

The fight goes out of Jean completely and he falls to his knees next to Marco's body. His head is spinning and he feels sick, lost unsure of what he's supposed to do. He feels a hand grip his shoulder, not as gentle as Armin's but still comforting.

"I'm sorry," Levi tells him.

Levi gives his shoulder a squeeze before his hand is gone and Jean is left kneeling on the cold hard floor. After a moment he feels a gentle hand on his and looks up to see Armin kneeling beside him. He doesn't stop to think, he just pulls Armin into a tight hug as the tears begin to fall from his eyes. Armin stiffens in his arms for a second, unsure of how to react, but eventually hugs Jean back and lets him sob into his neck.


	3. After All You Do Know Best

**Hi everyone, so here is the fall out from last chapter, managed to sneak an OPT from another show in here, I'll be very impressed if anyone can see my thinking on that one haha hope you all enjoy**

When the world stops for one person that doesn't mean it stops for everyone. To that one person it is almost inconceivable that the world can just continue turning, that people can go about their daily lives without noticing or knowing that tragedy has caused it to come to a juddering halt for them. There's a frustration that comes with it, an anger, a ' _just fucking get your head out of your arse and notice this_ ' but there is no point in it. The world will continue to turn, life needs to go on and certain events need to take their course.

Jean's frustration comes when Bertolt from the morgue come to take Marco's body away and it take every ounce of his self control not to scream bloody murder at him until he crawls back to the basement with his tail between his legs. Bertolt wins in the end – he has to, he's got a job to do – and then Jean is just left in the ED feeling numb, hollow.

He's tried to move, he's tried to get up and carry on with his day as he still has other patients, but he can't. He's stuck. Stuck kneeling beside the bed he let Marco die on. _If I had just got my head together faster then I might have been able to save him._ Fresh tears prick the corners of his eyes and it's just when he thinks he doesn't have any left in him to cry.

"Jean...?" a soft voice asks.

Jean blearily looks round through the tears and sees Armin standing in the door of the ED. "Hi..." he says, his voice rough and gravelly. _How long have I just been sitting here like this?_ He can't even think, he can't even process that time has been passing at all let alone how much.

"Are you okay?" Armin asks. Jean just stares at him, unsure of how to answer. Armin shakes his head. "Sorry that was a stupid question."

"How's his wife?" Jean asks. He knows that at some point he's going to have to go and talk to Lindsay but he can't face it. Unfortunately he has no idea when he will be able to face it. After just freezing like that he doesn't know if he'll ever be able to face her again.

"She's stable," Armin replies. "She hasn't woken up yet so she's not completely out of the woods but she is stable for now."

"Good..."

"Do you think maybe you should leave here?" Armin asks after a pause. "At least get out of the ED maybe?"

"I... I can't," Jean says, his eyes dropping to his hands again. The pity in Armin's eyes is almost too much for him and he can't even bring himself to look at him. _How the hell am I going to be able to face Lindsay if I can't even look at Armin._

He feels a hand on his shoulder and then the warmth of Armin's body beside him. "I'm sorry I had to leave earlier, I would have stayed if I could."

"It's okay."

"Do you need anything?"

"I don't know," Jean replies. He has no idea what he's supposed to be doing but he knows he should be doing something – he has a job to do. "I just... I just can't leave and I don't know why, he's not even here anymore."

"You did everything you could," Armin tells him after a short pause.

"No I didn't," Jean says shaking his head.

"Yes you did."

"No," Jean's voice catches in his throat and he swallows. "No I didn't, I could have done more."

"You can't think like that," Armin says.

"But I know I could have done," Jean says. "I... I saw him lying there and I just froze."

"That's understandable," Armin tells him. "Of course you're going to when you see someone you know. I know I wouldn't expect to see one of my friends in here."

"He wasn't just a normal friend through," Jean says. "He was different."

Armin scootches a little closer and takes Jean's hand, linking their fingers together. "Tell me about him."

"He was nice... too nice," Jean says, shaking his head. "Like he's the kind of person who would give up a kidney for a complete stranger, the kind of guy who people could easily take advantage of. When he found out I wanted to be a doctor he would come to me whenever he got hurt and I'd just end up yelling at him, like oh my god, go to a real doctor! When we lived together he used to use every single surface like a table – he'd just put things down and leave them there until there were piles and piles of unopened letters everywhere. He..."

Jean's voice cracks, breaking under the emotion of it all and fresh tears begin to flow again. He leans against Armin for support who doesn't hesitate to hug him, letting him cry into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Jean sniffs when he feels as if he can talk again. "I didn't mean to get all weepy like this."

"It's okay," Armin says, hugging him tighter. "Just take your time."

Jean looks from his hands into Armin's eyes and sees them filled with sympathy. He must look a mess – he knows he must – but all he wants to do is hold Armin like a lifeline. He can't go back to work just yet, he can't face the rest of the world but he can't stay in here forever.

Jean lets out a shaking exhale and dries his eyes with the back of his hand. "I need to go and talk to Lindsay."

"His wife?"

"Yeah."

"Do you feel up to it?"

"Not really?" Jean admits, "but I'm going to have to at some point. She's going to have questions when she wakes up and she should hear it from me."

"Are you sure?"

"I wish I hadn't frozen, just got on with my job and then he might still be alive," Jean sobs, breaking again.

"You really can't think like that!" Armin cries. "You're an amazing doctor and an amazing person!"

"Then why couldn't I save him?" Jean asks. He's never been very good at handling grief (especially not his own) and the weight of his inability to do enough to save Marco's life crushes him. Breathing is becoming harder and he knows he should just give it up and go home but then he'll just be on his own, stifled by his own feelings.

"Do you want me to talk to her?" Armin asks after a pause.

"What?"

"Marco's wife?" Armin replies. "I'll go speak to her if you want. I don't think you're in any shape to do so right now."

"I can't let you do that," Jean says.

"I don't mind," Armin tells him.

"But..."

"Please, let me, Armin says. "I know I can't exactly do much to help but I can at least do this."

Jean wants to. He really wants to let Armin help him. He shouldn't but it would be easier for his sanity if he just gave in and took the offer. He swallows his pride and nods.

"Okay..."

Still holding one of Jean's hands Armin turns to go but Jean isn't ready. He tightens his hold on Armin's hand and pulls him back into a hug. Armin's entire body stiffens for a second before he relaxes and hugs back.

"Thank you," Jean whispers, breath ghosting passed Armin's ear as he hugs him tighter.

"What for?"

"For everything," Jean replies.

"Anything I can do to help," Armin says giving Jean a comforting squeeze.

Jean can't even begin to put into words just how grateful he is. Armin owes him nothing but he's willing to help out just like that. He looks down into Armin's beautiful blue eyes and his heart clenches. _He's so nice... just like Marco..._

Neither of them hear the door open but Jean hears Levi's voice and it startles him into stepping away from Armin.

"Am I interrupting?" Levi asks, making them both jump.

"No sir," Armin replies timidly and Jean can't help but notice the blush springing to life on his cheeks.

"Good because the ED is not the place for whatever this is," Levi says, gesturing to the two of them.

"Sorry sir," Armin mumbles, looking at the floor.

"Kirschtein, I thought you might want to know that Lindsay Bott is awake."

"Okay," Jean nods.

 _Fuck!_

He thought he had more time but apparently his day just needs to be as bad as it can possibly be. His chest tightens and breathing starts to become difficult again. His legs feel like lead and he has no idea if he's going to be able to even walk out of here but deep down he knows that he can't stay in the ED forever. _You have to face her sometime..._

"I'll leave you to it then," Levi says.

"Okay," Jean says again.

Levi exits the room and Jean feels like he's beginning to crumble at the seams. _I can't do it... I can't..._ A gentle hand takes his and he's reminded that Armin is still there.

"Shall we go then?" he asks.

"I..."

"I'm here," Armin tells him. "Whatever you need I can do it and I'll be here every step of the way if you want."

"How are you so understanding?" Jean asks as the two of them leave the ED. He feels as if all the eyes in the building are on him but they're not, he knows they're not. Everyone is too busy going about their business to notice his watery eyes and glazed over look.

"Well you're my friend," Armin says, smiling, "and you need someone right now so I'm going to do whatever I can to help you out."

"Thank you."

"Do you still want me to go in first?" Armin asks as they stop in front of the curtained off bay he assumes Lindsay has been put in.

"Can you?" Jean ask in return. "I need to get myself together before I see her."

"Sure," Armin smiles and gives his hand a squeeze. He smooths out his coat where the hugs have rumpled him before he pushes the curtain aside and steps behind it. "Mrs Bott? Hi I'm Dr Arlert."

Jean tries not to listen as Armin tells Lindsay about Marco's death but he can still hear her sobbing through the curtain. His heart clenches and it feels like it's breaking all over again. Eyes clench shut and he tries to hold himself together. It's not working and all he wants to do is leave but he knows he both can't and shouldn't. He needs to stay, he needs to be here.

"Hey," a quiet voice says and he opens his eyes to see Ymir standing next to him.

"Hey."

"I heard about what happened to your friend," she says. "I'm sorry, I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through right now."

"I'm... I don't know."

"If there's anything I can do to help just let me know," Ymir says in a rare moment of compassion underneath all her usual cynicism.

"Thanks."

"Is that his wife?" Ymir asks nodding to the curtain where they can just about hear the faint murmur of Armin's voice.

"Yeah, Armin's talking to her," Jean replies.

"Armin?" Ymir asks, brows furrowed in confusion. "Why's he talking to her?"

"He said he's do it," Jean replies. "He was in the ED as well so he knows what happened well enough."

"He'll do just about anything for you, won't he?"

"Don't start," Jean sighs. He knows the kind of train that Ymir is about to jump on and he's really not in the mood for it. Not after everything that's happened.

"I'm not," Ymir promises. "All I'm saying is that there's something there. I can tell when you're interested in someone and you're definitely interested in him."

"Kid's a good doctor," Jean says, "nothing more than that."

"There is more to it than that," Ymir insists. "You never get this invested with anyone so why him?"

Jean doesn't know how to answer that. If he keeps protesting then Ymir will continue to push until he finally cracks (and considering how broken he already feels he won't hold out that long). At the same time he doesn't feel as if he can get into what Armin means to him when all he can think about at the moment is Marco.

He opens his mouth to try and answer when the curtain is pulled back slightly and Armin sticks his head out. If he wants to ask what Jean and Ymir are talking about he has enough sense to know that now isn't the time.

"Sorry to interrupt," he says, "but um... she'd like to speak to you Jean, if you've got a minute."

"Sure," Jean says. He's thankful for the excuse to not have to think about this anymore but at the same time he now has to talk to Lindsay. Even if he doesn't feel ready he knows he'll have to, he can't avoid it forever.

"Just think on it, okay?" Ymir says and leaves, clapping Jean on the shoulder before she goes.

"You okay?" Armin asks after a pause.

"Yeah," Jean lies.

He pushes the curtain aside and steps behind it. He doesn't want to look but his eyes are instantly drawn to Lindsay in the bed. She looks awful but nowhere near as bad as Marco did. A lump springs to life in his throat and he can feel tears pricking the corners of his eyes already. He's not ready for this and he has no idea what to say that will make anything any better.

He swallows the lump down and tries to make his voice work. "I... I'm so sorry..."


	4. He Will Admit To Everything

**Hey everyone here's the next chap, hope y'all enjoy it!**

Despite the fact that all Jean wants to do is crawl into bed and not come out unit the funeral he just about manages to pull himself together enough to go back to work. It's hard and it hurts like hell but he just about holds it together and doesn't fall to pieces when he's there. He avoids the ED as much as possible (which is easy enough) because he knows that he just can't face it and, so far, he's survived well enough. The hustle and bustle of the average day helps him to keep out of his own head.

It's when he has to stick around for a night shift that he wonders if he's actually going to be able to keep it together. Hospitals at night are quite eerie and they leave you with too much time to think, something that Jean has been desperately avoiding over the last few days.

"How are you holding up Kirschtein?" Levi asks, suddenly appearing behind him and making him jump.

"Yeah..." Jean replies once he's recovered from the shock enough to speak. "Yeah I'm totally fine."

"Good," Levi says although Jean's pretty sure Levi knows that he's lying. "You didn't have to come back to work so quickly if you're not ready."

"Like you said we're still understaffed and staying at home all day isn't really something I want to do right now."

"Well it's good to have you here," Levi says, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Thanks."

"You want some coffee?" Levi asks. "I need something after the x-ray I just had to explain and legally I can't drink at work."

"Sure," Jean shrugs. "What was the x-ray?"

"Kid with a hairbrush shoved up his ass," Levi replies shaking his head.

"What?"

"I fucking know right and he insists that he has no idea how it got up their either."

"Was it the old 'I fell on it'?" Jean asks.

Levi clicks his tongue. "For once I just want someone to be honest and admit that they did it because they were bored and horny."

"I'm sure there are better ways to alleviate boredom than shoving things up your butt," Jean mutters as Levi opens the door to the _On Call_ room.

The room should be deserted as the only other doctor on call tonight is Hanji and she's on the ward terrorising drug addicts but it isn't. Stretched out on one of the beds is Armin, fast asleep and looking as peaceful as he possibly can sleeping on a glorified bunk bed.

"Fuck's he doing here?" Levi mutters. "He's not on call tonight, he shouldn't be here."

"He's just sleeping, he's fine," Jean says but Levi clearly isn't listening.

"If you're not working you shouldn't be here," he says. "Fucks you up for when you actually do have to work."

He goes over to the bed and gives Armin's cheek a harsh prod. Armin stirs slightly but doesn't wake up so Levi continues to prod him. Armin's eyes slowly flutter open and he looks up, a little dazed, until he realises that he's looking up at Levi. His eyes widen and terror flashes across his face as he sits up.

"Dr Ackerman!"

"What are you doing here Arlert?" Levi asks.

"I... er... I'm on call tonight," Armin stammers in response.

"Oh really?" Levi asks sceptically. "Because I have the call sheet here and your name isn't on it."

"Oh... um... well..."

"So you'd better have an incredibly good explanation or a cardiac arrest in the next thirty seconds or –"

"It's my fault," Jean says suddenly jumping in to his rescue.

"What?"

"I asked Armin to come in tonight as well," Jean lies. "I know sometimes nights can be pretty bad and I thought we could use the extra help. I forgot to update the call sheet so that's why he's not on it." It sounds plausible enough and he hopes it's a good enough excuse to keep Levi from tearing Armin to shreds for being at work when he shouldn't be. It's always been one of Levi's strictest rules – if you're not at work and you're not ill get the fuck out of the hospital.

"Oh... right..." Levi's gaze shifts from Jean to Armin a few times and Jean worries that he's about to be found out. Eventually Levi shakes his head and sighs. "Update the sheet next time, I am too old for this bollocks."

"I will."

"And you," Levi says turning to Armin, "if you're going to sleep make sure you have your pager next to your head so you can hear it if someone contacts you."

"Yes sir," Armin mumbles.

"I'm going to make some coffee," Jean says, desperate to fill the slightly tense silence.

"Yeah I'll take a coffee," Levi says. "If I'm going to get surprises dropped on me and hairbrushes up asses I need caffeine."

"What?" Armin looks confused.

"Don't ask," Levi grumbles. He pulls a chair out from under one of the slightly grubby tables. Almost as soon as he sits down the pager on his hip begins to beep. He unclips it and looks at it, eyes darkening. "Mother fuck it! Can't even get ten minutes to sit down. I'll have to take a rain check on that coffee I need to go and sort out a bleeding hooker."

"Need a hand?" Jean asks, more out of politeness and a sense of duty than any actual desire to go. If he's given the choice between assisting with a bleeding prostitute and spending some time alone with Armin he knows which one he would rather chose.

"It's fine," Levi says. "If I need you I'll page you." And with that he's gone leaving a silence hanging heavy in the room between Armin and Jean. Armin rubs the sleep out of his eyes and looks so vulnerable that Jean wants to pull him into a hug and never let go.

"Thank you," Armin says when the silence has stretched on far too long.

"What for?"

"For covering for me."

"Don't sweat it," Jean says as he turns to finish making the coffee. "You would have done the same thing for me."

"I suppose so, yeah."

"So do you want to tell me what's really going on?" Jean asks.

"It's nothing," Armin replies.

"Oh yeah? So you're sleeping at work while you're suppose to be at home because you like how comfy the beds are?" Jean asks as he goes to sit beside Armin. He hands him a cup of coffee – the one that actually resembles coffee rather than the crap stuff.

"Good point," Armin chuckles.

"So..." Jean presses.

"It really is nothing," Armin says. "It's kind of a long story I guess."

"I've got time."

"I've got this patient," Armin says. "Her name is Mikasa and her kidneys are failing. She's going in for a transplant soon and she's nervous, although she won't say anything. She has some dialysis stuff she has to put up with as well and I thought it would help her out if I was here. I'm just getting some kip before I go to the ward again."

"Oh..."

"I know what you're going to say," Armin chuckles after a pause, looking down into his coffee.

"Oh yeah?"

"That I'm getting too invested with my patients again."

"Well... I suppose so yes but you're just being a good doctor," Jean says.

"Thanks."

"So other than that you're not pushing yourself so hard during the day you collapse here instead of going home?" Jean asks.

"No I'm fine," Armin smiles. "What about you though?"

"What about me?"

"How are you holding up?" Armin asks.

"I'm fine," Jean shrugs.

"Really?" Armin asks.

"Yeah," Jean lies looking down at his coffee.

"Jean this is me you're talking to, you don't have to put on a brave face if you don't want to," Armin tells him.

"Okay... in that case I am struggling," Jean admits, his voice suddenly thick and hoarse. "I just can't stop thinking that I could have done more for him... for both of them."

"You need to stop putting yourself through this," Armin tells him placing a hand on top of Jean's. "You did everything you could – we all did – but the odds were against us on this one and this isn't all just down to you."

"I suppose so," Jean sighs. "I just wonder what's the point of it all then?"

Armin thinks about this for a moment before he finally sighs. "I guess because we have to keep going," he says. "I mean if we just give up then there really is no point but we do what we do because we want to and because we can make a difference."

He's right. Jean knows he is and what he's saying makes a lot of sense. There's no point in giving up just because things are difficult. Marco wouldn't want him to just give up and wallow in self pity. Marco would tell him that he needs to pick himself up and move on. He still needs a little bit of encouragement though and he knows he needs to ask for it.

"Hey Armin..."

"Yeah?"

"Marco's funeral is next week," Jean says, squeezing fingerprints into the top of the Styrofoam cup for want of something to do with his free hand. "I... um... I don't know how it's going to go but would you mind coming with me?"

"You sure?" Armin asks.

"I mean if you don't mind," Jean says, still unable to take his eyes off his hand. "I just... I don't know if I can face it on my own."

Armin gives Jean's hand a squeeze. "Sure."

That makes Jean finally look round at him. Armin smiles and he looks so sincere and adorable that Jean can't help but put his coffee cup down on the floor and pull Armin into a hug. He inhales deeply, taking in the smell of disinfectant with the underlying hint of something fruity, something just so quintessentially Armin. It's wonderful, like a beacon of hope in this entire shit situation.

"Thank you," he whispers into Armin's hair.

"No problem," Armin replies and Jean can hear the smile in his voice.


	5. Where Did I Go Wrong, I Lost A Friend

**Hey guys, it's the day of the funeral and Jean is having about as good a day as I've had, hope you enjoy it**

The morning of Marco's funeral dawns and Jean is awoken by the sun steaming in through the curtains he forgot to close the night before. He would be in a good mood (and he is for all of thirty second) if it weren't for the fact that he has to go and watch his best friend get cremated later this afternoon. If he closes his eyes he can still remember the last time he and Marco were in bed together – limbs entangled and lips finding skin just before Jean went to medical school and they decided that they should just be friends.

Sometimes he wishes that he had been more selfish. He wishes he'd tried harder and told Marco that he wanted the two of them to stay together. Maybe if he had things would have turned out differently. Maybe if they hadn't broken up he would be waking up to Marco in his arms rather than in a cold, empty bed. Maybe he wouldn't have been in that car...

But he can't think that way forever. _What's done is done, you can't change it so you just need to keep moving forward_ as his grandmother used to say. Jean sighs as he heaves himself out of bed. Today is going to be a long day and the sooner he pulls himself together the easier it will be to get through.

He switches on the radio so that he doesn't have to be alone with his thoughts as he showers and starts to get dressed. He's struggling with his tie and getting more frustrated by the minute – he hasn't worn a tie in years and apparently the muscle memory isn't enough – when a knock at the door catches his attention. He leaves the tie open around his neck and goes to answer it. Armin is standing there holding coffee and a brown paper bag.

"I bought breakfast," he says smiling.

"Hi," Jean says a little confused.

"Hi," Armin echoes shyly.

"Come in," Jean stands aside so that Armin can enter. "What time is it?"

"Half nine," Armin replies. "I'm early, sorry."

"It's fine, thank you for breakfast."

"How are you doing?" Armin asks as Jean leads him through to the kitchen.

"I've been better," Jean replies.

"Sorry," Armin winces. "Stupid question."

"It's okay," Jean says giving Armin a small smile. "So what's in the bag?"

"Bacon sandwiches," Armin grins, "and actual real world coffee that doesn't taste like dish water."

Jean places his hand over his chest theatrically. "Marry me."

As soon as the words are out of his mouth he half wishes he could take them back. The most adorable flush springs to life on Armin's cheeks and it makes Jean's heart skip slightly.

"So... um... I didn't put sugar in either of those 'cause I didn't know how much you took, if any at all," Armin says, abruptly changing the subject.

"That's cool, I've got some," Jean says opening a cupboard and routing around for it. "Um... you er... you look nice by the way."

"Thanks," Armin says and Jean doesn't have to look at him to know that the blush is still there. "So do you."

"I can't seem to get this tie right though," Jean chuckles humourlessly, flipping one of the ends of it.

"I can fix it if you want," Armin says.

Jean shrugs. "Sure."

He's about to take it off and hand it over when Armin takes hold of it while it's still around his neck and begins to tie it. Jean can feel a heat creeping up the back of his neck. He can smell the sweet fruity fragrance of Armin's shampoo and he has to look up at the ceiling to stop himself from freaking out. Armin's eyes are fixed on his hands as he works, neither of them wanting to say anything and break the spell.

"There," Armin says smiling as he straightens it out. "All done."

Jean looks down to see that he does, in fact, look half way presentable. "Thanks."

They're close, too close and Jean doesn't know if it's his imagination but Armin's fingers seem to be lingering on his tie. He shakes himself because he must be imagining things and thinking like that is so fucking inappropriate today of all days. He clears his throat and runs a hand through his hair.

"Shall we eat up and head off before the traffic gets awful?" he suggests.

"Sure," Armin smiles in return.

* * *

Another angry honk of someone's horn sounds from behind then and Jean can feel his fury spiking. Of all the days for there to be traffic it had to be today. No one in Trost drives like a sane person and every single time Jean is cut off by someone he really has to bite down on the urge to hurl some obscenities back at them. The traffic lights are also trying his fucking patience on top of it.

"Suck a cock!" he yells, finally giving in when someone cuts in front of him and has the audacity to honk at him as well. He grumbles to himself before he remembers that Armin is sitting next to him and he flushes. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Armin chuckles. "I know traffic around here is insane, it's fine."

"You drive?" Jean asks.

"I can, I just don't," Armin replies. "My places doesn't have parking and it's easier for me to bike places."

"Makes sense," Jean says. "It's not like you can ever get up that fast speeds here although most people try."

"Well you know what they say about people who live life in the fast lane," Armin says.

"What?"

"They don't live in fucking Trust."

Jean chuckles. "Thank you."

"What for?" Armin asks.

"For making this bearable," Jean replies. "I don't think I would be holding it together if you weren't here."

"You'd probably be shouting at other drivers a lot," Armin chuckles and Jean can't help but smile.

"Probably."

* * *

It feels like it takes years but they finally reach the crematorium. People are still milling around outside but if Jean squints through the doors he can see Marco's coffin ready and waiting. His breath catches in his throat and he suddenly doesn't know if he can go inside any more. He feels sick and dizzy, like he might pass out, and his limbs feel like lead.

A hand slips into his and gives it a comforting squeeze. The simple action brings him back to himself and he turns to see Armin smiling at him.

"You okay?"

"Um... I... I think so.." Jean replies.

"You sure?"

"No," Jean admits.

Armin gives his hand another squeeze. "I'm here."

"Thank you."

"Shall we go in?" Armin asks after a short pause.

"Yeah..."

Jean doesn't want to and he doesn't really know if he can but he gets his legs moving. Having Armin beside him helps, more than he would have thought. Jean doesn't know many of the people around him, save Lindsay, and she had her hands full talking to people.

The service starts and Jean listens to the vicar talking about Marco and what he was like. It's a strange sensation listening to someone talk about a person they've never met like they know all about them and it might have been enough to make Jean angry if he wasn't so broken. As curtains begin to close around the coffin Jean can feel tears at his eyes but he tries to hold it together. Marco's words from when they first met echo in his mind – _you should smile more, you look less scary when you smile_ – and despite everything he does. A smile that's just for Marco.

From beside him he feels Armin slip his hand into his, linking their fingers together. The tears as his eyes begin to silently make tracks down his face and he squeezes Armin's hand. He wishes he could tell Marco that he doesn't have to worry about him anymore, that he's going to be just fine but he can't. The best he can hope is that Marco knows and wherever he is it doesn't suck too much. Jean's never really put much stock in believing in heaven but, if there is one, that's probably where Marco is.

People start to file out of the crematorium as the service comes to a close, Lindsay thanking each of them for coming as they leave. Jean doesn't want to hang around so he hugs her and tells her to call him if she needs him before turning to Armin.

"Shall we go home?" he asks.

"Sure," Armin replies with a nod.

* * *

They don't go straight home. They stop for dinner first, at a greasy spoon where most of the other patrons give them funny looks because they're in all black suits. Armin does his best to lift Jean's spirits a little by pointing out that he had treated the waiter, who is busy shamelessly flirting with everyone he serves, for a horrendous case of gonorrhoea a few weeks ago. Jean's not too proud to say that it works, especially after the waiter then turns his attention on Jean.

Finally they pull up in front of Armin's house and Jean kills the engine. It's dark and it feels like a whole other day when Armin arrived at his that morning. He turns to him and gives him a small smile.

"There we go," he says.

"Thanks," Armin says. "I was going to say thank you for today then realised how horrifically inappropriate that would be so thank you for dinner."

"It's okay," Jean chuckles. "Thank you for coming with me."

"It's fine."

"Seriously I wouldn't have made it through today without you,," Jean tells him.

Silence falls between them for a moment, Armin's eyes flicking from Jean's eyes to something else. He looks like he's going to say something but can't get the words out. Jean is about to ask him if he's alright when Armin closes the distance between them and presses their lips together.

To say that Jean is surprised is an understatement. His entire body freezes and he has no idea what to do because there is no way that he's wanted to do for so long is actually happening. Armin is actually kissing him, in his car no less, and Jean just can't seem to process it. Armin eventually notices that Jean isn't responding and pulls away, looking terrified and hurt in equal measure and even that doesn't seem to wake Jean from his stupor.

"I'm sorry," Armin says hurriedly. "I'm so sorry."

Jean still can't get his brain to work, even as Armin unbuckles his seatbelt and opens the car door.

"I'll see you at work, okay."

And with that he's gone. Jean barely has time to spring back to life and call "Armin wait!" before the door is closed. Armin darts to his front door and is inside before Jean can blink. He sighs and hits his head on the steering wheel, cursing himself for not being faster.

"Fuck!"


	6. You Begin To Wonder Why You Came

**Buckle up kiddies it's about to get sad(er), hope you enjoy**

Levi gives Jean some compassionate leave after the funeral and while he's incredibly grateful for the time away from all the blood and all the death and all the rest of it, it gives him too much time to think. He tries to do some useful things like cleaning and pretending that he doesn't spend more than two hours a day at home and it works but his thoughts keep turning back to subjects he doesn't want to have to deal with. It's not just being alone inside his head to think about how he could have done more to save Marco; his mini sabbatical means that he has no chance to talk to Armin.

He thinks once or twice about going round to Armin's but he has no idea if Armin would be home or would even want to see him if he was. When he finally works up the nerve into going round there is a big buff blond guy waiting outside so he thinks better of it. _Could be a new partner or something..._ Maybe he'll find a way to talk to him at work...

The week goes by way too quickly and before Jean knows what's happening he's back at Trost General, preparing himself for a long shift. A coffee will set him up for the day so he heads over towards the break room. As he nears the door he hears voices and hangs back to listen, instantly recognising one of them are Armin's.

"I mean I have been for a while now," Armin says.

"I figured," Levi's voice says and Jean wants to know what they're talking about so continues to hang back. "It was rather obvious."

"Sorry..." Armin sounds so dejected that Jean just wants to hug him.

"It's fine," Levi says, "but I'm worried. Why are you sleeping here so much when you're not on call."

"It's nothing."

"Arlert," Levi says a little more firmly, "it's obviously not nothing. You need to get out of this place every once in a while otherwise you'll go crazy."

"Okay."

"I'm not going to be angry, just tell me. I might even be able to help sort out whatever it is," Levi says.

"It's just that my ex has started coming round to my house again, trying to get me to take him back, and it's easier if I'm not at home when he shows up," Armin says. _Well that must be the big buff blond_ , Jean thinks to himself.

"Have you thought about calling the police?" Levi asks. "They can help you out, get restraining orders or something."

"No it's fine," Armin says. "I don't want the trouble."

"Arlert..."

"No seriously," Armin says hurriedly. "He'll get bored eventually and leave me alone when he finds himself someone new. It's just because he's been turned down."

There's a long pause before Levi sighs. "If he keeps bothering you then you need to talk to someone, okay?"

"Okay."

"Changing the subject," Levi says after another pause, "have you spoken to Kirschtein lately?"

Silence.

"Um... no," Armin finally says and Jean can guess that he's blushing. "I haven't seem him since the funeral."

"I just wondered how he was doing," Levi says. "I'm worried about him as well."

"You worry too much," Armin chuckles.

"God help me if it's not the patients it's you lot," Levi says.

Now Jean feels even more awkward about listening in on the conversation but he can't leave. He wants to hear what Armin might reveal about what happened. Would he tell Levi about the kiss or would he keep it to himself? Would he have any reason to tell him?

"I can go see him at some point and check on him," Armin says and Jean can't help but smile.

"He's back at work today so I'll try and catch him at some point, don't worry," Levi says.

"Excuse me," a voice says from behind Jean suddenly and he turns to see a small dark haired girl hooked up to an IV drip standing in front of him, holding onto the pole for support.

"Hi..." Jean says, feeling confused. _Okay I have somehow acquired a child..._ "Are you okay? Are you lost?"

"I'm looking for someone, can you help me find him?" she asks.

"Sure thing Sweetheart, who are you looking for?" Jean asks. He has no idea how to talk to children and now seems like a really bad time to start learning.

"I'm looking for my Uncle Levi," the girl replies. "He's a doctor here."

"Sure he's in here," Jean tells her feeling a little baffled. He's never really thought about Levi outside the context of the hospital before, he's never really thought about him having a family but he supposes he must. "Um what's your name?"

"Mikasa," she replies. "And you are?"

"Jean Kirschtein."

"Are you a doctor too?" she asks after a short pause. "You look like a doctor."

"I am yeah," Jean says, still unable to believe that he's even part of this conversation.

"Good then I can trust you."

"That's very sensible, trusting doctors," Jean agrees.

"I trust _some_ doctors," Mikasa says matter-of-factly. "I don't like the ones with needles."

"Fair." Jean doesn't really have anything else to say to that but Mikasa is looking up at him expectantly. He rubs the back of his neck. "Um shall we go in and see your uncle?"

"Yes please."

"Okay." He extends his hand to Mikasa who takes it and he leads her into the break room. He knocks on the door before the enter. "Hello?"

Levi rolls his eyes. "You don't have to knock Kirschtein, I know you've been gone a week but you still work here you fu–"

"I found a visitor," Jean says cutting off the end of Levi's sentence. Even if she is his niece she probably shouldn't hear him swearing like a sailor on leave.

"What?"

"Uncle Levi!" Mikasa cries happily letting go of Jean's hand and running to Levi. "And Armin's here too, yay!"

Armin turns and smiles when he sees her. "Hi Mikasa, how are you doing?"

"I'm great," Mikasa beams at him.

"What are you doing out of bed?" Levi asks picking her up and putting her on his lap.

"Was bored," Mikasa replies. "Wanted to come say hi."

"You know you shouldn't be wandering around," Levi scolds, "it's dangerous."

"Sorry," Mikasa mumbles, looking sheepish.

"Well it's a good thing Jean found you and brought you here safely," Armin smiles. Jean looks down at Armin and their eyes meet for a brief second. A blush springs to life on Armin's face and he turns back to Mikasa. _Guess he's still not ready to talk about that kiss yet then..._

"Come on Monkey I'll take you back to your room," Levi says putting her back down on the floor and pushing himself to his feet. "Say thank you to Jean for bringing you here."

"Thank you Jean," Mikasa says smiling up at him and Jean can's help but smile back despite how strange it is hearing Levi call him by his first name.

"No problem."

"It was nice to meet you," Mikasa says.

"It was nice to meet you too," Jean says.

"Bye Armin."

"Bye Sunshine," Armin says.

"Come on Monkey," Levi says taking her hand and leading her towards the door. Just before they leave Levi turns back. "Oh Kirschtein, your man Springer is in again."

"Okay I'll go see him," Jean nods. "Thank you."

Levi and Mikasa leave the room and an awkward silence falls between Armin and Jean. Jean wants to say something but he doesn't know what and jumping in with 'so that kiss after my ex's funeral' is really not the way to go about it. He clears his throat to say something at the very least but Armin gets to his feet and hangs his stethoscope around his neck.

"I should be getting on too," he says. "Good to have you back."

"Armin wait," Jean says grabbing Armin's wrist before he can leave. Terror fills Armin's eyes. He knows what's coming but there's no way Jean can't _not_ ask him.

"Y... yeah?"

"Can we talk, at some point?" he asks.

"Um..." Armin looks away, cheeks turning pink.

"Please," Jean begs. He needs to know why Armin kissed him and if he can kiss him again that would be a bonus.

Armin's teeth tug at his bottom lip uncertainly and the action is so damn cute that Jean wants to kiss him anyway. "Okay," he says finally. "Later okay, I need to go see a patient now."

"Okay," Jean says letting Armin's wrist slip through his fingers and watching as Armin practically darts from the room. _He sighs to himself. I guess I'll go back to work then..._

* * *

"Hey Doc," Connie grins as Jean walks through the door to his room.

"Hey man," Jean grins back taking Connie's hand and shaking it vigorously. "How have you been?"

"I've been great," Connie says. "Been travelling round Africa, it's been awesome!"

"Wow," Jean nods, impressed. "Well travelled."

"Hell yeah," Connie grins. "I wanted to get stuck in and immerse myself in some culture for a change."

"And," Jean says, his eyes flicking over Connie's chart, "I see that while on these travels you neglected to go and see any kind of medical professional, medicine man or scary Witch-Doctor with the holes in his ears."

Connie at least has the decency to look sheepish. "Sorry Doc, I got kinda busy and forgot all about it.

Jean chuckles derisively and shakes his head. "Pst Connie," he says in a theatrical whisper, putting his hand to his mouth as if he were telling him a great secret, "cancer is one of those things you need to keep a check on."

Connie rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment. "I know, I know, I just got kinda distracted."

"Oh yeah?" Jean asks sceptically.

"I met this girl," Connie replies, a smile spreading over his lips as he thinks of her.

"Colour me surprised it's about a girl," Jean says rolling his eyes. "So she comes on to the scene and you forget to check up on your own health? That about the size of it?"

Connie shrugs. "She makes me forget about it for a while at least," he says. "I mean I've been feeling fine since I was given the all clear so it was easy to sort of push it to the side. You know?"

"Yeah," Jean says with a sad sigh. "I know." He'd give anything to be able to block out some of the thoughts going on inside his head. He plasters a smile on his face. "Go on, what's her name then?"

"Sasha," Connie replies, "and she's amazing Doc. Like she's so funny and beautiful and she cooks the best food. She's just brilliant, quite easily the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Seeing the love and adoration in Connie's eyes shows just how crazy he is about this girl. Jean pats Connie's knee and smiles. "Then you need to get out of here so you can get back to her, okay?"

"It's a routine biopsy," Connie shrugs. "I'm not nervous, you know."

"Good."

* * *

The rest of Jean's day is nowhere near as fun. It's getting right back into the swing of it, the question of why he does this creeping back again. It's particularly gruelling when he knows he's faced with someone who is blatantly lying to his face.

"So have you taken any drugs in the last twenty-four hours?" he asks a blonde girl with a dazed, bored expression in her eyes.

"No," she says, "I never take drugs." Judging by how red and unfocused her eyes are if Jean believes that then he'll believe anything.

"Good," he says, plastering a huge fake smile on his face as he picks up a syringe from the tray next to him, "because this injection I'm about to give you will kill you if it's mixed with narcotics."

The girl's eyes widen. "Oh yes, drugs, I take them all the time," she says.

"There we go," Jean says. He's about to start chewing her out for lying and wasting his time when a knock at the door stops him. He turns to see Hanji standing there.

"Hey Jean, you got a minute?" she asks.

"Yeah." He strips off his gloves and goes to the door. "Everything alright?"

"I just thought you should know," Hanji says that look of sympathy he knows only too well in her eyes and Jean's stomach drops, "Connie Springer died earlier."

"What?" Jean almost can't believe his ears. _But he was fine when I talked to him..._

"He arrested earlier, there were some complications and there was nothing we could do," Hanji says. "I'm sorry, I know the two of you were close."

Jean doesn't say anything. He can't find the words to say. Connie was supposed to be one of the ones who got out of this shit-hole, not one who ended up downstairs. _Someone's going to have to tell his new girl... she needs to know..._

"Do you want me to finish up here and you take a break?" Hanji asks.

"Please," Jean says, his voice hoarse.

"Sure things," Hanji says giving his shoulder a squeeze.

"She's high as a fucking kite by the way," Jean tells her as he leaves the room.

He doesn't even think about where he's going. He needs somewhere where he knows he will be alone. Thankfully the first door he comes to is an empty supply closet. Shutting the door behind him he braces himself against one of the shelves and shouts out his frustration. Frustration for Connie, for Marco, for every patient that has ever come through the doors that he wasn't able to save.

Once he's finally done he sighs, runs his hands over his face and looks round. As it turns out he isn't as alone as he thought. Armin is standing almost hidden in the corner, eyes red and tears streaking his face. Jean straightens up and runs a hand through his hair. _Well this is incredibly fucking embarrassing..._

"You okay?" he asks.

Armin opens his mouth to lie but a chocked sob is all that comes out. "No."

"What's wrong?" Jean asks taking a step towards him.

"It's Mikasa," Armin says. "She died."

"What?" For the second time in minutes Jean feels like he's been punched in the gut. "What happened?"

"She was fine," Armin says shaking his head, "and then her heart just stopped..." Another sob racks his chest. "How is that fair? She was only six, how is any of this fair?"

Tears streak down Armin's cheeks and Jean's heart breaks for him, for all of them. He closes the distance between them and pulls Armin into a hug, holding him tightly and letting him cry into his chest.


	7. Grant Him One Last Choise

**Morning everyone, getting near the end of this now. I thought I'd throw another fun crossover in this chapter for funsies and mostly because Armin and Yuuri share the same English voice actor (as do Jean and Otabek). Hope you enjoy :)**

The break room is blissfully empty when Jean and Armin sit down ten minutes later, with a cup of coffee each. Armin still looks a little red around the eyes but he's stopped crying, which is something. He smiles when Jean hands him the cup. Jean leans over the table to give his Armin's hand a squeeze. He should let go afterwards but he leaves his hand on top of Armin's. It's warm and solid and he doesn't care in the slightest if anyone walks in and sees them together.

"You okay?" he asks, finally breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Armin replies, giving him another small smile. "You?"

"Me? Yeah I'm fine," Jean replies before snorting derisively and shaking his head. "We're both lying, aren't we?"

"Oh yeah," Armin chuckles but the sound is hollow.

"I'm sorry," Jean says.

"About what?"

"About Mikasa."

"Don't be," Armin says. "There was nothing to be done, it's just the nature of working in a hospital."

"I guess..."

Armin sighs shakily. "I just thought she would be one of the ones to get out of here."

"How's Levi doing?" Jean asks.

"Really not well," Armin replies. "He got really angry, smashed a chair – like actually shattered it – before breaking down. I think he's finally gone home for the first time in about three years."

"Understandable."

"I'm sorry about Connie," Armin says after a pause.

Jean sighs. "Like you said, nothing to be done about it, it's just the nature of this job."

"I know but still after Marco..." Armin tails off and looks down at his coffee. "Um... how have you been since then?"

"I slept a lot," Jean admits. "I think I've slept more in the last week than I have in the last month."

Armin chuckles. "The joys of time off."

"There were a few things I missed though," Jean says fixing Armin with a pointed look.

A blush flushes to life across Armin's nose and cheeks, that adorable embarrassment back again. He looks away but he doesn't move his hand so Jean takes that as a good sign. _He's not running away this time..._

"I guess you're not talking about the coffee," he says.

"No," Jean says. "So how do you deal with it?" he asks after it becomes obvious that Armin isn't going to say any more about his almost confession.

"Deal with what?" Armin asks looking back at him.

"With this place."

"Right."

"I mean aside from crying in the supply closet," Jean says and that blush is back again.

"Oh..."

"I'm sorry," Jean says hurriedly, "that came out wrong. I didn't mean anything by it."

"No it's okay," Armin says, a sad smile gracing his lips. "I'm aware that it's not the most professional thing in the world to do, or the most sane."

"It's fine," Jean says thinking back to his own outburst. "I mean it's not like it's in front of patients and we've all got the cope somehow."

"I guess so."

"A better way of asking that: what do you do to forget about this place for a bit?"

"I go ice skating," Armin replies after a pause.

"Ice skating?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

"I can take you if you want to try it?" Armin offers after a pause.

Jean thinks about this for a moment. It feels like a date and he can't deny that his heart skips at the thought. "Sure I'm game."

"Shall I meet you after work then?" Armin asks, eyes and smile practically glowing.

"I'm on a late one, will the rink still be open?" Jean asks.

"Don't worry, we'll be fine."

* * *

"Yuri!" Armin calls as he pushes the door of the seemingly deserted rink open. "You still here?"

They are met with silence and Jean is about to suggest they leave when a small blond suddenly pops up from behind the desk. His cheeks are flushed, his hair mussed and his clothes rumpled so there's no prize for guessing what he's been up to although there doesn't appear to be anyone else around. Not that Jean can see anyway.

"Armin," the blond says, slightly out of breath and with the slip of an accent, "what are you doing here?"

"I was wondering if we could use the rink tonight?" Armin asks. "If it's not too much trouble."

"No it's fine," the blond (who Jean assumes must be Yuri) says. "Bad day?"

"Kind of yeah," Armin replies.

"Shit, I'm sorry," Yuri winces. "Here." He picks up a set of keys from the desk top and tosses them to Armin. "Lock up when you're done, I was going to head off anyway. Just post me the keys tomorrow if that's cool."

"That's great, thank you so much," Armin says happily.

"You and your friend need skates?"

"Yeah that would be great," Armin replies. "Um this is Jean, he works with me at the hospital. Jean this is Yuri, an old friend from school."

"Hi," Jean grins sheepishly.

"Hey," Yuri offers him a nod. "What size shoes do you take?"

"Eleven," Jean says.

"Cool," Yuri turns, picks out two pairs of skates from the shelves behind and places them on the desk.

"Thanks Yuri, I really appreciate this," Armin smiles.

"Don't sweat it," Yuri says waving him off. "I'll er... I'll leave you guys to it just go right ahead."

"Sure," Armin says. "See you later Otabek."

Jean wonders who the hell Armin is talking to when a second man pops out from under the desk. This one slightly taller, with a dark undercut but no less rumpled. He nods to Armin, clearing his throat.

"See you later."

Stifling his giggles Armin grabs a pair of skates and Jean's hand. "Come on let's go."

"Nice to meet you," Jean calls over his shoulder. He just about has time to grab his skates before Armin pulls him away.

* * *

"So... how do you know about this place?" Jean asks, clutching the side of the rink in a desperate attempt to stay on his feet. He hasn't been ice skating since he was about five and he's forgotten how hard it is to stay vertical.

"I've know Yuri since high school so when he started working here he got me to come down and taught me a few things," Armin says as he glides gracefully over the ice.

"Were you in the same class?" Jean asks, a little spellbound as he watches Armin do a very simple flip.

"Yeah," he replies as he comes out of it. "Both of us lives with our grandfathers, both of us were short and kind of girlie looking so we got picked on a lot."

"Really?"

"That surprises you?" Armin asks with a sceptical grin.

"Okay, okay I get it," Jean laughs.

"The kids left us alone when Yuri head-butted one of them and broke his nose," Armin chuckles, "but we always stayed friends and looked out for each other. He taught me to skate and I fixed his injuries when he had a particularly hard fall on the ice."

A sad smile twists its way onto Jean's lips. _That used to be Marco for me..._ He feels a pang of sadness in his chest, of sadness or guilt he doesn't really know but he's broken out of his thoughts by Armin skating over to him.

"Need a hand?" Armin asks.

"No I'm fine," Jean lies waving him off.

Armin chuckles and offers him his hands. Tentatively Jean prises his from the side of the rink and takes them.

Slowly Armin skates backwards, leading Jean who keeps his eyes glued to his feet in a desperate attempt to stay on them. He can feel his legs shaking a little but holding on to Armin is incredibly nice; he's warm and solid and there in front of him.

"Can I ask you something?" Armin asks, suddenly breaking the silence and making Jean look up.

"Um sure, fire away."

"How do you..." Armin begins but then stops to think what he's saying before he opens his mouth again. "How do you feel about me?"

"What?" Jean asks blinking.

"Ah that still came out wrong," Armin groans. "I just wondered, I'd been thinking about it a lot. I mean you've always been super supportive at work and then asking me to go with you last week... I don't know."

"Well I..." Jean begins and then stops, trying to figure out his own way of phrasing what he wants to say.

"Its just that I was talking to Ymir the other day," Armin says and Jean wants to laugh and tell him that's a rookie mistake but keeps his mouth shut and lets him continue. "She said that you don't usually spend time with people outside work but here you are with me."

"That is true."

"But when I... when I kissed you last week you didn't react," Armin says. "I know I shouldn't have done it and it was incredibly inappropriate and..."

Jean uses the grip Armin has on his hands to pull him forward and into a hug. It might not be the most sensible thing in the world as there is a good chance they'll end up on the ice but the urge to hold Armin is too overpowering. He feels Armin hesitate for a second, caught off guard, before he relaxes and hugs back.

"I'm quite crazy about you," Jean admits. "I have been for a long time now I just didn't know how to tell you."

"Oh..."

"I was so surprised when you kissed me that I didn't know what to do so I just froze then you disappeared before I could do anything," Jean says. "I thought about going to your house to talk to you but I didn't know if you'd want to see me after what happened. I should have reacted faster but I guess I just didn't want the first time I kissed you to be in my car after a funeral."

"Well..." Armin says looking up, that adorable blush sprinkling over his cheeks, "how about here then?"

Jean can feel a heat creeping up the back of his own neck and his heart begins to pound. "Here is good."

One of Jean's hands slips up to cup the back of Armin's neck. The tip of his nose is a little red from the cold so Jean presses a soft kiss to it. He tilts his head down, letting his breath fan across Armin's lips, before closing the distance and kissing him in the middle of the rink.


	8. I Would Have Stayed Up With You All Nigh

**Hello everyone, here is the last chapter of this, I hope you've enjoyed it and you enjoy the porn :D**

They stood in the centre of the rink, completely lost to everything but each other's lips, until Jean tried to move forward and lost his footing falling backwards and bringing Armin crashing down on top of him in a heap of giggles and more kisses. Once they composed themselves they locked up the rink and headed home. Now Jean has Armin pressed up against his front door, trailing kisses down Armin's neck as fingers clutch at his hair and pull him closer.

"Jean!" Armin gasps softly as Jean's teeth scrape his collarbone. "Ah! We... we should go inside."

"Okay," Jean says between kisses but makes no move to stop. Now that he has Armin in his arms, writhing underneath his lips and he can continue kissing him he's not going to stop any time soon.

"Seriously it will be more comfortable inside," Armin chuckles.

"Okay," Jean says again.

Armin turns in Jean's arms, pulling his keys out of his pocket and trying to stop his knees from giving out as Jean's teeth scrape his earlobe. The soft little moans and gasps he's letting out are beautiful and going straight to Jean's cock. He can't wait to give in after all this longing and finally have Armin spread out beneath him.

"Okay," Armin says when he finally gets the door open, "this is me." He takes Jean's hand and leads him inside.

To say that Armin's place isn't what Jean expected is a huge understatement. It's one room that seems to function as a kitchen, bedroom and living room all in one. There is a damp patch on the ceiling from the flat above and the chill in the air says that the windows aren't double glazed. It's a wonder Armin hasn't gotten ill living in a place like this.

"It... it's not much, I know, but I'm not here that often so it's okay," Armin says turning on a small lamp and Jean looks up to see that the ceiling light is hanging by a single, very broken looking wire.

"Are you sure it's safe for you to live here?" Jean asks.

"Well they never completely gave the all clear on the Asbestos but it's all I can afford after medical school," Armin says. "I keep asking about things that need to be fixed but so far the landlord seems pretty unconcerned."

"Armin this place is a hovel," Jean says. A little blunt he knows but it needs to be said.

Armin sighs. "I know but, like I said, it's all I can afford at the moment."

Jean slips his arms around Armin's waist and pulls him close so that he can kiss him again. "How about I take you to mine and I can absolutely spoil you for the rest of the night. How does that sound?"

"That sounds good."

* * *

It doesn't take them very long to get to Jean's and, true to his word, as soon as they get in Jean treats Armin to some food. It's nothing fancy but the smile on Armin's face and the sparkle in his eyes fills Jean's heart. Once they're done Jean takes him upstairs to run him a bath. Armin's eye practically bulge out of his head at the sheer size of the bathroom.

"This place is huge!" Armin marvels as Jean tests out the water.

"Yeah," Jean chuckles. "I inherited this place when my mother decided she wanted to go travelling and needed someone to house sit indefinitely."

"Oh wow!"

"Bath is ready," Jean tells him, his fingers brushing the hem of Armin's shirt.

Teasing his lower lips with his teeth Armin tugs at the collar of Jean's shirt. "Want to join me?"

"Yes please."

Jean very much enjoys stripping Armin of his clothes, finally getting his eyes (and hands) on his body. There is a lot of touching, hands wandering as they both strip down to skin. Lips enter the fray and they almost forget about the bath altogether. Once they slip into the water Jean is very glad he has a bath big enough to accommodate the both of them, Armin settling comfortably between his legs.

"This is nice," Armin sighs contentedly, leaning his head back against Jean's shoulder as Jean's fingers draw idle patterns over his stomach.

"It is," Jean agrees pressing a soft kiss to Armin's temple. "I could quite happily stay like this and not go back to work tomorrow... or ever."

"About work..." Armin begins after a tentative pause. "Should we... do you think we should really be doing this?"

"Taking a bath?" Jean asks, a teasing lilt to his voice. He knows where Armin is going with this but he doesn't really want to entertain that notion right now.

"I mean..."

"I know what you mean." Jean says. He slips his hand into Armin's, linking their fingers together.

"I mean do you think it will affect us working together if we hook up?" Armin asks.

"Well I was kind of hoping that this would be more than just a one night hook up," Jean admits. He feels Armin stiffen in his arms and he wonders if he's blown it but then Armin laughs and he relaxes.

"Thank god," Armin says turning that radiant smile on him. "I thought maybe this meant more to me than it did to you but I'm so glad that I was wrong."

Jean takes hold of Armin's chin and tilts his head a little so that he can kiss him, long, slow and passionate. He can feel Armin practically melting in his arms and he really does want to freeze this moment and stay like this forever.

"Armin Arlert I am crazy about you," Jean says frankly, spelling it out for him, "and I don't think it's worth not trying just because we work together."

"Good, me neither."

"Besides," Jean continues holding Armin a little tighter, "we've both lost friends recently. Life is too short to not take chances and I want to take this chance with you."

For a second Armin doesn't say anything and Jean thinks he's blown it. Then Armin disentangles himself from Jean's arms and he thinks he's really blown it but then Armin turns, wraps his arms around Jean's neck and kisses him deeply. For a second Jean doesn't know how to react but he works it out pretty swiftly before Armin pulls away. One hand cups the back of Armin's head and the other rests on the small of his back, keeping their bodies flush together.

Armin gasps into the kiss as Jean's teeth graze his bottom lip so Jean takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into Armin's mouth. In seconds he has Armin moaning and clinging to him. The sounds coming from the back of Armin's throat go straight to Jean's cock. He thrusts his hips up ever so slightly and he can feel how hard Armin is. He wants to take Armin into his room and take him apart till Armin is writhing beneath him and begging for more. He wants to see that beautiful face contorted in pleasure and knowing that he's the one responsible for it.

"Oh fuck!" Armin gasps as Jean's fingers begin too ghost up one of his ass cheeks. "Oh fuck, Jean please!"

"Yes angel?"

"I want you to fuck me," Armin practically cries as he grinds down on Jean's cock. "I want you..."

"You're so beautiful," Jean whispers in Armin's ear as his fingers dip down even lower. "Can't believe you're here."

"I'm yours," Armin says as he presses kisses to Jean's neck. "I'm yours."

"Then let me take you to my room and I can really make you mine," Jean says and Armin shivers.

"Oh god yes!"

Having to prize his hands off Armin in order for them to get out of the bath but they're on each other the second they can be. Lips and hands explore every inch of skin and Armin pulls away from Jean's neck with a gasp as one of Jean's hands wraps around his cock. Jean can feel him trembling underneath his touch and it makes him ache; he needs to get Armin in his bed as fast as possible. It would be so easy to pick him up and pound him into the wall but he wants to take his time and he wants Armin beneath him.

"Je... Jean, please..." Armin begs, blunt nails digging into Jean's shoulder as his hand speeds up.

"Please what beautiful?"

"Please stop teasing me and just fuck me!"

"As you wish," Jean all but purrs. He places both hands under Armin's ass, having a nice good grope in the process, and lifts him up. Armin wraps his legs around Jean's waist, pressing himself right up against Jean's chest. With their lips still attached Jean stumbles down the hall to his bedroom, fumbling with doors and lights as he goes.

When they finally reach the edge of the bed Jean topples over, catching himself of his hands before he squashes Armin completely. His breath stills in his throat as he looks down and sees Armin on the bed beneath him, surrounded by the halo of his hair. He looks absolutely beautiful and Jean can't help but marvel that Armin is even beneath him at all. He reaches over and brushes Armin's fringe out of his eyes.

"You're so beautiful," Jean whispers on an exhale.

Armin reaches up to run his fingers through Jean's hair. "So are you."

Jean leans down and presses kissed to Armin's forehead, nose, cheeks and finally his lips before pulling back. He tosses Armin a wink that has Armin teasing his bottom lip with his teeth again. Wanting to get back to the beauty spread out on his bed as quickly as possible Jean grabs a condom and some lube from his bottom draw. (God bless Hanji and her weirdly inappropriate Secret Santa gifts.) When he turns back to Armin, though, his heart nearly stops.

Armin is lying in the centre of his bed, legs spread wide and hand lazily stroking his cock looking at Jean with eyes filled with desire. Exhaling shakily Jean settles between his legs, pressing kisses up Armin's thigh letting his breath ghost along Armin's skin. Armin's hand stutters as Jean's tongue skims over his balls and Jean can't help but feel a swell of pride.

He can't wait any longer so he uncaps the lube and squirts a generous amount onto his fingers. He takes Armin's wrist and pulls his hand away from his cock so that he can take him in, right to the back of his throat as he slips the first finger in as deep as he can get it.

"Oh god! Jean!" Armin cries as Jean's tongue works him up and his finger works him open. Jean loves it even more as Armin grabs fistfuls of his hair. Armin's thighs tremble as Jean's tongue runs up the underside and his grip on his hair tightens. Jean knowing that he's the one making Armin tremble like this has Jean's cock practically throbbing with need.

A second finger joins the first and then a third and Jean has Armin crying out and quaking beneath him. The fingers in his hair tighten even more as Jean really works him open. He can feel his own self control slipping and he needs to get inside Armin as soon as possible. He can tell that Armin wants it by the way every muscle in his body seems taught, ready.

"Jean!" Please... I can't take it... I need you!" Armin begs and Jean can't resist him any longer.

He pulls off Armin's cock with a filthy wet pop that has Armin thrusting his hips up for more. Jean smirks to himself, watching every reaction as he teasingly slowly pulls his fingers from Armin. The little lip bite is what really gets him speeding up, ripping the condom open so that he can sink into Armin's tight heat. He fumbles slightly in his hurry but he gets the latex on and covers himself in more of the lubricant.

"You okay?" he asks as he settles himself between Armin's legs. He places a hand on Armin's thigh to steady himself before he loses it completely.

"Yeah," Armin pants, his voice filled with tension and need. "I'm so ready for you."

Without another word Jean presses his lips to Armin's and sinks inside him to the hilt. Armin feels like heaven around him, so tight and so hot that he can't help but groan into his mouth. Jean hold himself still, waiting for Armin to adjust, as Armin clings to him letting out the most adorable little moans and whimpers.

Finally, after what seems like an eternity, Armin thrusts his hips up ever so slightly silently telling Jean he's ready. It's all the invitation Jean needs to pull out and start thrusting back in at a furious pace. He can feel himself drowning in everything that is Armin and he needs to make Armin feel as good as he does. He presses his lips to every bit of skin he can as he pounds into Armin, making him moan.

"Oh god Jean!" Armin cries as Jean shifts his angle and begins to ram into his prostate. "Oh god I'm getting close."

"Me too," Jean pants, his gut tightening as every single muscle in Armin's body squeezes him. Holding himself up on one hand he reaches down to begin pumping Armin's cock, really making him scream.

"Jean! Oh fuck... fuck me harder!"

"You want it harder," Jean groans with a smirk.

"Yes! Please I... I need it!"

The words are like music to Jean's ears and he begins to really ram into Armin's body. Armin is quaking and quivering beneath him and Jean feels like he's hit the jackpot. Armin looks beautiful – mouth slack, eyes a little unfocused and blushing. His eyes slip closed and he arches off the bed with a wordless cry and cums. Jean presses his lips to Armin's, swallowing each gorgeous little whimper as he continues to thrust into him. It doesn't take long for him to reach his own peak, especially with Armin tightening around him like a vice. He fills the condom, groaning as he loses himself in everything Armin.

He presses his forehead to Armin's panting heavily. His heart feels like it's going to burst, he's so happy to have Armin with him. He places a hand on Armin's cheek and kisses him deeply, loving Armin's hum of contentment.

"You're beautiful," Jean whispers.

"So are you."

"I should probably go and run us another bath or something like that," Jean says.

Armin's arms tighten around his neck tighten slightly. "Stay here a bit longer?"

"Gladly," Jean smiles leaning down to kiss him again, feeling happier than he has done for a very long time.


End file.
